Colors Intertwining Combining Creating a brand new hue. Oh, but who wants it to be grey Dull boring life gone astray Its funny how they all say Choose a side Night or day Black or white Left or right No No longer can i see a difference. No longer do i believe in making a decision. No longer do i feel i need position But rather Prefer to be lonesome Alone Ignoring the senseless battle Cattle Lets not be Birds Rather. Free. Flying. Wings. Defying gravity. Defying the laws. Defying the rules of society Oh, be normal they said. Get a job they said. Go to school and be another head. Just a head. A number. For them to get ahead For them to win at chess Chess ? I dont know how to play. I only know A couple board games. Board games. If only those were the only games we knew of. Dont hate the game. Hate the player. No wait. Hate the game. Because maybe its all they know. Or maybe its part of their show. Fine. Play your pity. Play your pathetic Sorry Childish game. No i have no sympathy No i dont feel bad I think youre kind of lame And stuck in grade ten Grade 10 ? School. Which one ? Oh id love to stay home And learn all on my own But people are watching and i cant stop now. Get this done and finish whats real. Whats real ? Not sure Not anymore, at least People dont seem real I dont seem real This does not seem real But thats just how i feel When i enter this career Can i help? Show me something. I dont believe in wasting. Energy, sanity or the number wheel Number wheel. Yeah thats it. And i love it when you laugh at me Love it or hate it But youre still watching So, go ahead But at the end of the day youre still the audience Anticipating my next move My next word My next fall My next crash and burn But honey, im a bird And birds dont crash. You You are.... Everything you wish you werent Far from perfect I still think youre excellent Yeah you love the attention But when will you change your mind And request the nice kind Oh, wait. I forgot. Youre someone you said youre not. Well im guilty too Im not so special just a fool For playing with the devils inside my head Fun for a while but then i feel dead Dead ? Arent we all Were not even alive Were all just lost In a place where we go To fix what happened years ago Did i say too much again ? Not everyone gets it. Spill the beans, spit the seeds Oops i did it again So whats it gonna be ? Another lost in space Another one erased Go ahead. I have no say When i dont even own this place Just another uninteresting face In the crowd of fakes I dont believe the sad realization After all my trust and information I never did believe your explanations You brought me to scary destinations. Psychotic belief systems, manipulating thought formations All while laughing. Im not upset, i saw it coming I called it. Yet i went running. You ruined everything So cunning Roses have thorns ? I look at you as a venus fly trap Look at me, you say Arent i just so lovely Yet you devour all of our energy So you wanna know how i feel ? Embarrassed. Stupid. Pathetic. Oh how it was so surreal Ill miss it , i think Ill miss it here Where tormenting chaos felt better than nothing. I dont even know what im saying I just pour my thoughts out At my finger tips Touching letters, typing this Stupid shit That goes on and on and on Infinite My mind is clockwork. It turns and spins all around So much noise and so much sound I could probably write a novel. About 3 men who had no soul One was honest One was clueless And one disguised it. They brought a woman their gifts. Sex Love And friendship I still dont know who wins Its not my fault i had that vision. I thought differently ever since. I just didnt know their intentions Cause love dont exist in this dimension Tension Heart pounding Body sweating Head aching Dehydrating Its not a great place to be Yet i come back almost every week I still dont understand why i repeat This madness and absurdity I needed to think and seek clarity But now im focused on letting my thoughts free Cause how else could i get them out of me Im scared of paper diaries Where my psychosis could be seen Its funny how i think this is a retreat Stacking and searching and scanning and self defeat None of this has some sort of meaning But i dont mind showcasing my kind of anxiety The worst is becomming property No, you want to think for yourself. You want to make your own choices. You want to break free from restrictions. You want to believe theres no limitations You want to have motivation You want to become an inspiration You want to get an education. You want to create a better nation But Dont let your imagination get carried away In a world where no one can play You dont wanna end up alone In a place where no one stays Or even knnows how to get there. Wait. Some do. They will play along. They want to break you down They dont my true emotions When it comes to their contributions Like yes !! Make me feel like fame and fortune Where am i going with this ? OH YEAH. the thing is.... Once youve answered a question Go on to the next one Curiosity never hurt anyone. Not the cat. Nor the bird. Or human. I really dont think its bad Unless you cant handle the ugly truth This world is cold its mean and cruel Everything is fake and you will be used You got to give in or be abused I dont want to think about last nights news Everything is fucked up and its sad but true I dont know what the fuck to do I need to relax and stop and choose Logic thinking and realistic views Like who are you and who are you Who are they and why do i feel chased Do i have something they want to take Did i make a bad mistake ? Are they trying to make me pay For what ive done, all those days ? For all my careless dangerous ways For causing all kinds of uncertain waves Give what you want to get they say Sorry i didnt know that until yesterday But i can say ive learned today Not everybodys what they say All i want is to feel safe In a world where all they do is take Theres no more left to give away Just me myself and all the great I used to have, i know it stayed Magic, miracles, spells or jokes If i was sleeping then i awoke I walked a thin and very long rope Across the waters of despait and hope That was then, but this is now That part of me left the other day Ill never go back im too afraid My heart and soul was beaten and raped So why should i have all that weight ? This burdens too heavy that they gave All ive seen is too much to take I went ahead I went behind Or maybe i lost track of time Or maybe its just all in the mind Or maybe i am just too blind To understand what i did find I feel as if i did a crime I feel as if im not inclined To do my duties and do my time Duties ? Youre kidding right Youre nothing special. Its been a lie. But why should i be sad ? Its been the most fun ive ever had Life is short so be alive Come alive and show the world your light Show the world the night Show them they were right Apologize for the fight Its strange This exchange Reactions of an action It has to stay balanced How does it even make sense Amongst the stars and the galaxies were one tiny planet the size of a seed Lifes precious Never waste any time Clocks dont stop ticking Seconds dont stop passing Days dont stop ending Nights dont stop coming The world stops for nothing Keep moving on "I want to hold you close Skin pressed against me tight Close your eyes So lovely it feels so right Soft skin, beating heart I whispered in your ear I wanna fucking tear you apart" And thats kinda when she recognized her own devilish ways.