the very last image of you
forever trapped in my mind
i looked at you and smiled, because,
you wore some favourite things of mine.
After so much pleasure and sexual energy
coursing through my veins pouring out like waterfall lakes
As I threw up my purple hair you stared
And you stood in my doorway
looking especially fly in all my favourite attire
You probably smiled as I drifted so quickly into a blissful sleep
With my music of all genres lulled me to sleep
Because you left me
and although all those days it was no lullaby you sang
but simply a gentle kiss on the neck
and our bodies’ closeness.
I made you my all cause it was all I needed.
And now you have left and I am left with nothing.
You took all those things – a pendant from my best friend of ten years
My favourite sweatpants
The only pair of sunglasses
Ive ever truly liked
not because they looked good on my face
But because they were from the dollar store and didnt have those annoying nose holder things that got caught in my haor whenever my hair was tied up.
That fucking image will never leave my head
Because you looked so damn good in everything
I took pride when you wore my things.
Why ciuldnt you have just come to fucking bed ?
Now everything youve left behind
im not sure if it was cause you were in a rush to leave, or your way to compensate for my stuff.
Right now i want to throw all your shit in the firepit in the backyard and let it fucking burn
I cant handle any of your remains
i want to erase every fucking memory of you.
go ahead and settle for that egotistical looking bitch who looks like she has nothing to give.
what about everything we saw?
magic, miracles, witchcraft or spells?
what about all those promises?
the fucking shit you said to me
ideally i want you dead.
nobody understands that i dont just jump into any relationship
i swore id never settle for anything less than extraordinary.
or was i simply too thirsty to love and fuck everybody i wanted, or too afraid to open up and be comfortable?
i” dont do relationships” id always tell people.
But this time I told everyone how excited I was that Ifound you.
Dont blame God for what you did to me.
Thats no fucking excuse.
whats she got that i dont have ? a dick?
Lord, forgive me for my anger.
But how the fuck am I ever gonna heal this time ?
If youre going to use someone as a replacement or for a feeding
dont you dare ever do what you have done to me.
and fuck you if youre smirking.
I am me and I cant help these feelings
you promised me a dream and I dont want to go alone.
I dream youll walk back right through my door.
I hope our memories haunt you
I hope you wear my things cause you loved me too.
but am I just a fucking fool ?
Right now Im having trouble believing in faith that
you’ll still be mine at the gates..