reality is burning me dead

i cant go
i cant go on, so
how do i move along, so
i hate goodbyes, so
i sing a sad song
i fucking miss you all so
so much
pain unbearable
how do i go on? so,
i’ll cry myself to sleep tonight
youre not here to hold me tight
i cant fucking forever fight
this pain will eat me alive
tonight although the stars are bright
my soul is lacking its inner light

my child, you are so bright
you are the age of only nine
but your intelligence mirrors even mine
youre gonna go far kid.
i told you secrets of this darkness called life
i hope youll always remember some of the insight
cherish the beautiful time we had tonight.
you were here for me when no one else was in sight
my life now lacks depth
without you, without him.
this feels a lot like death.
i pray i’ll get to see all you beautiful people again
God, please give me strength.

“Honestly, what will become of me?
Dont like reality, its way too clear to me.
Why do all good things come to an end?”


youve touched my heart like no other in such little time.
How am I ever going to be fine?

Here comes the part
Where I break my own heart
I look into your eyes
And they just dont seem to shine
So here comes the end
Even though this was just the start
I’ll push you away
So fucking far
I’ll break you apart before I fall too deep into love
Us… This… Whatever this is…
I really thought I could trust
But im building my wall back up.


I dont need to talk
For your words are my exact thoughts

And i dont need to dream alone
Were dreaming ’bout that same old home

And i dont need to be afraid
I dont think you’re inflicting pain

And we dont need to be the same
Embrace our fire, go insane

And we dont have to sit and stay
Lets go, just go so far away
Where no one knows our face or name
But somehow we remember the place…



But Who are You ?

I cant look into your eyes
Theyre just too deep
No one was ever able to
See right through me

Afraid but I am pleased
I dont remember a time
Where my own eyes
My own eyes, couldnt tease

What are you trying to do
Proclaiming your power
And I thought I was alone
A sole lonely flower

And so I take a deep breath
Take down my wall
You express sincere interest
And im not afraid to fall.

You are so refreshing.
I want to know your soul…..


I know now

Dont let the truth
Get you tainted

Unfinished business
Left for later

Unresolved karma
Was I the traitor ?

Im sorry I
Didnt know this earlier.

How come I dont
But you can remember ?


At least now I know who you are
Maybe in our next lifetime
Things will work out.
Maybe you just need
To search and dig deeper
Bittersweet and short lived
But i know that was safer
My ego tries to stop me
From seeing youre a faker.
So i guess i’ll go now
See you later


I only know Lust.

Baby dont envy me
I know i shine a little too bright
We kiss, and
i leave your skin dusted in twilight
Sparkles sprinkled on your face.
We can share whats mine.
Youre the dark and im the light.
Together we can be one tonight.

……. you turn me on like a fucking flashlight.
Put your hands right here like that
Yeah, i know i put up a fight
I live for the chase.
Leaving me with nothing
But my delicious daydreaming desires.
I know im playing with fire
But i was never one to follow advice.

Baby, its been a little while
How long are you willing to wait?
Until i explode and cave…