Do i get it yet?

I know whatever goes around comes right back around
sometimes it slaps you hard
Leaving its mark plain on your face
Or at times it swirls by in the wind
Barely leaving behind any trace

“Everybody gets what they deserve”.
Maybe the cards weve been dealt
Arent so ‘wild’ .
Perhaps our past lives
Or even great achievements in this one
Manifests into the quality of life we have now.

Ive paid my karmic debt.
I hate what feels like a curse
I never wanted anyone getting hurt.
“Queen of Hearts”
The people finally took them back.
I wasnt trying to show off a collection.
I wasnt trying to capture and crush them underneath on the snowy cold pavement.
But that it what i did, 5 years ago, everywhere i went, by simply being just me.

I paid my debt.
It destroyed me in the process.
And the destruction still lingers.
When night falls and im alone with these words
Im also alone with you.

After all these attempts
Replacements, bandaids, distractions
It has been months after all.
I guess i’ll just be happy
Pretending these words are your own.

———————–

Let us be free from the infinite loop of karma.
Those whose intentions
Never was meant to do any harm
And whose intentions have and will always be none other than good.

I do not wish to be untouchable by karma
But why should i suffer when all i ever wanted to do was be myself and help ?
I used to feel bad.
But i cant change my blueprint.
And i shouldnt be punished for that

Or simply dont let it accumulate.
That debt really sort of fucked me up.

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